Growing Old

  You know you're old when you go out and come home at 9:45.  There isn't any more to this post, I'm just feeling old.  Tomorrow is going to SUCK.  I'll be a little hung over. Jack on special is a bad idea.

Chuck Lorre

  I was watching one of my favorite shows, The Big Bang Theory, and thought I should let you guys in on a semi-secret.  Chuck Lorre is the producer of the show and writes funny things on the screen.  Also, Kelly Cuoco plays Penny and I have a slight crush on her, but I digress.  Just check this site out.

Chuck Lorre's Website

  Chuck Lorre is a TV producer with a resume that include The Big Bang Theory, Two and a Half Men, Dharma and Greg, Grace Under Fire, and more.  After every episode, a white screen shows up with a funny story or commentary.  Next time you watch The Big Bang Theory or Two and a Half Men, pause it at the end and check'em out.  Or you could cheat and visit the website. 

The uncensored version of 217 is my favorite

State of Oklahoma testing

  I went to take an employment test for the state of Oklahoma.  It wasn't too bad, but I don't know how well you have to do to get a job.  The lady who checked me in was Asian and could barely speak English. What was her score? I would imagine it wasn't very good.

  Also, the online job description listed the hiring decision was "100% Written Test".  Does this mean there are no interviews?  What if I made a 100 on the test and was asked to interview?Could I show up wearing flip-flops and drunk?  If I showed up and didn't get hired, I'd be pissed.  In fact, if I were drunk and was wearing flip-flops, I'd probably take one off and slap that guy in the face.

  100% written test? That's just fucking stupid.  No wonder our state blows.

Winans of Norman

  Today, Steph and I went to Winans of Norman on Main St.  It's a little coffee/chocolate shop.  I guess it's national, but this is the only one we know of.  It was okay.  It's the kind of place you take a date. But make sure you don't take her early in the relationship.  There's nothing to do but talk and drink coffee.  If you go on a first date, there won't be a second. I'm just saying.

  On that subject, the perfect first date: the movies.  Why? If you talk too much on the first date, you'll both be tired of each other or find something out before the "sex date".  Nobody wants to miss the sex date.  You should only find out if you truly like each other AFTER the sex date.  Words of wisdom.

  In conclusion, Winans of Norman is pretty good, but not amazing.

A-Roid

   Alex Rodriguez is such a bitch.  I'm so glad that he's trying to come out and tell everybody "the truth" about his STEROID use.  But, I'll be damned, he's lying.  The newest news involves A-Rod's involvement with a gentleman who was named in the Mitchell Report and is banned from MLB clubhouses.  Angel Presinal, the "trainer", stayed in hotel rooms with A-Fraud's cousin as recently as last year.

   I hope they strip A-Rod of all his awards and records. I want him to be banned from baseball and see how long it takes him to get fat.

Predictive Text

   Predictive text is a scourge on our society.  In all honesty, it pisses me right off.  I have to translate the meaning of garbled text messages.  What does "I'll do it when I get good" mean? Oh, "good" is spelled with the same buttons as "home".  People, stop being lazy and type the shit you're trying to type.  "He we go, I'll call you."  What the hell? Oh, "If we go, I'll call you." I spend about 15 minutes a year deciphering texts.  (I completely made that statistic up.)

Stupid Celebrities and Names

While we're discussing names and celebrities...

Most Bizarre Celebrity Baby Names

Kal-El - son of Nicolas Cage

Pilot Inspektor - son of Jason Lee

Kyd - son of David Duchovny and Tea Leoni

Prince Michael II/Blanket - son/plaything of Michael Jackson

Audio Silence - son of Shannyn Sossamon

Tu - son of Rob Morrow (let me know when you get that)

Name Game

I got some of my neighbors mail in my mailbox today.  His (or her, I guess) name is Dung.  That sucks.  It made me think that some people have really shitty names.  I'm going to list some real names of celebrities and see if anyone knows them.  If you know, or just want to guess, just leave a comment.  Answers to follow.

1. Calvin Broadus

2. Lawrence Tero

3. Maria Nunez

4. Jonathon Leibowitz

5. Terry Jean Bollette

6. Carlos Ray

Rumble the Bison

  Am I the only one who's tired of seeing buffalo everywhere?  We have statues in Bricktown, we have them on the retaining walls of the interstate, and now we have to have them as our only professional team's mascot.  I have a newfound hatred of buffalo.

  I called in to the Morning Animals this morning and was told that Rumble wasn't a buffalo, but a bison.  Who gives a shit? Do you? I don't.  I admit that they did a good job making a buffalo not look like a big and useless hairy cow, but who wants to be known as the state that only has Indians and livestock?